Friday, August 08, 2014

Summer 2014 August 8 Friday (Death)



81 degrees this morning.  Very muggy also. My “wicking shirt” was overwhelmed during my walk, but still more comfortable than an old style jeresy.   Walk was 55:35 minutes, also did sit-ups and weights.  Didn’t ride bike yesterday due to light rain.

Attended funeral yesterday.  It made me think about the forms of death we encounter.

The funeral itself was very interesting.  Apparently, the person had lived a life of her own choosing and the services reflected some of the favorite parts of her life,including a song I have never heard at a funeral before (Trashy Women,by  the group Confederate Railroad).

The service also reflected some of the difficulties she encountered in life.  Maybe some of the lyrics of the song reflect that, such as the following:
I like 'em sweet, I like 'em with a heart of gold.
Yeah an' I like 'em brassy, I like 'em brazen and bold.

I actually felt a lot of admiration for her as I learned about her life.  I never met her (and obviously never will), but she apparently lived life on her own terms.  

Thinking about death, I thought about how moving (another job, another City) is a lot like death in a sense.  You are moving on to another stage of life.  While, unlike physical death, you can visit where you moved from, you can never really return no matter how hard you try.  It is simply different.  (I always liked the title of the book “You Can’t Go Home Again”).  Not bad, just a change.  

It’s not that I don’t enjoy the visits and find them rewarding, it just that it is a different experience.  It is not living there.  I wouldn’t want to miss the visits, but it is never the same.

I even learned that when I was a child, and I was gone for a week or so.  When I returned, I was amazed that life had gone on without me!  I’m not quite sure what I expected when I returned, but I was surprised at how I felt.  I can’t even put it in words now. I remember I always felt I was missing something when I was gone, even though I was having my own experience.  

I think when you move, you are feeling the death of routines, the death of friendships (even if continued in a new or revised form or relationship), the separation from the physical house you lived in, relationships with neighbors etc, relationships with Doctors, and the person who does your hair, even the feeling of loss from places you enjoyed eating at or shopping at.  Even though I never said one word to them, I even felt the loss of the people I exercised with in the morning.  There was a feeling of attachment, even though we never spoke.

I have mentioned before that a friend of mine used to say “Live is a series of Hello’s and Goodby’s”   I always hated it when he said that, even though I realized the truth to it. I guess physical death is the final goodby.

Of course, changing of jobs/job lose and  moving also brings along with it the thought of separation and loss, major changes in your life and your realize your life will never be the same.  The changes are permanent, which is a form of death.

Oddly enough, I finished listening to “The Bully Pulpit” this morning, which of course concluded with the death of Teddy Roosevelt and William Taft.   (The book said Teddy Roosevelt “died in his sleep, which is probably the only way death could happen to him, if he had been awake he would have fought it!”).  

Of course, death also means you start another stage of life.  When I think about it, I realize every day is a series of deaths and renewals, we just notice the significant deaths and renewals. 

Death of one stage and starting of another stage isn’t necessarily good or bad, it just is.  

(Change of thoughts here!)  Scheduled for Apple store session today, I always enjoy them and learn something new every time.  


That’s it for now, Friday, August 8, 2014.

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