I had coffee with two homeless men in Starbucks tonight. Not really “had coffee”, but they were in Starbucks when I was. (They didn’t buy anything, but they did eat a sandwich they bought in and washed it down with what looked like gin, or maybe it was a bottle of water.)
They were quiet and courteous. They unloaded their possessions, actually enough to seriously impede their mobility, and, I couldn’t help but notice, quite nice luggage (actually gym type bags.)
Of course everyone carefully ignored them and they didn’t bother anyone, except to ask someone if it was supposed to rain.
It is rainy and cold (and most of all, windy) here (in Oklahoma City) and I suddenly thought how I don’t like rain and wind as an inconvenience, it is really important if you are homeless.
I couldn’t remember the last time I thought of a homeless person as other than someone I see walking down the street, asking for money at the intersections or asking me for money as I carefully avoided looking at him or her.
Actually, the last time I probably associated with homeless persons was when I was in college and working summers in Denver. I came from an extremely small town and probably had never been in a city as big as Denver. I came out to work at a summer job in a Samsonite Factory. (I can still do the moves I did on the assembly line.)
My Mom gave me a check to sustain myself until I got my first paycheck, and, of course, no one was about to cash a check from a city they had never heard of before!
I actually slept in the bus station and other areas for several days until the bank associated with Samsonite finally cashed the check and my parents sent me some more money! Actually, I never had any problems, although I kept my distance also.
I still probably won’t look at homeless people any differently and I still resent being asked for money. Years ago, I started adding a little extra on tips to servers etc., but I refuse to succumb to what I consider to be extortion of someone asking me for money on the street.
I decided a long time ago, I’d give a little extra to help working people, but not panhandlers. I realize probably a percentage actually really, really need the help, but I just don’t like being approached asking for money. It isn’t just Memphis, I’ve been approached on a regular basis in Lakeland at gas stations. Maybe I’m not thinking about it in Lakeland, so I look more like I might give, but I especially resent it when I am approached late at night, it is too much like a robbery attempt. I probably should give something just on the basis that I may be helping someone who really does need it, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I’m much rather continue adding a dollar or two the tips to people who work and are trying to help themselves.
It was an interesting experience and certainly gave me a more personal experience with the current group of homeless people (I have a feeling the ones I saw tonight were some of the “new” homeless, who may have had a good job, owned their own home and never thought they would be homeless, in the recent past. It is easy to look at them and see myself in their place and question my thoughts on this and my policy of not giving money to panhandlers.
As I am reminded, given an unlucky break here and there, it could just as easily be me.
