When I'm 63

Three years ago, I wrote, on becoming 60, that in 10 years I will be 70. Next week, I will be three years into that 10 years!

I have found aging relatively simple thus far! While I can’t say I am looking forward to it, I am comfortable with the notion that I will be 63, which seemed, it seems only a short time ago, as impossibly old!

I can’t say I would accept the offer to do my life over again, if it was possible. I think what I didn’t know when I was younger and wonder how I survived!

I think the worst thing about growing older is the knowledge that your options are closing on you each day, each month, each year and each decade. I enjoy the fact that I enjoy walking and bicycling every day, but I dread the day I realize I can not longer bike or briskly walk everyday and, the worst in our world, not being able to drive.

I accepted the fact I would not have a full head of hair almost 4 decades ago, although I’m not sure what I would have done (no, I know!) if some of the treatments that grow hair had been available to me in my twenties. I remember how I felt when I realized I would have to give up running in 5 K races (due to a heel problem) almost 15 years ago and when I had to give up weightlifting and the punching bag (due to a shoulder problem) several years ago, although I still have hopes of that.

As I grow older, I realize there will be books I always wanted to read, movies I wanted to see, experiences I wanted, places I wanted to visit that I will never do it. So far, it is a feeling of acceptance rather than sadness. I always think of an experience years ago, when a man in his seventies told me how much he had always wanted to travel. He thought he would do it “sometime” but he hadn’t. I was saddened two weeks later when I read of his death. In the next few years, I gradually learned to enjoy the journey and not worry so much about the destination.

The punching bag. I truly loved the punching bag when I was younger! I remember going at the punching bag and imagining a person on the other side! I worked off a lot of anger that way.

Strangely enough, I seldom feel such anger anymore. Some time ago, I think I decided that life was too short to worry about such things, although I still occasionally get angry, I usually take a deep breath and forget it.

I have discovered the frustration of attempting to convey my experience to younger persons and realize they aren’t following my good advice any more than I did the good advice of my parents, teachers, other older persons when I was their age! I guess it take a certain amount of experience to learn to try to avoid foolish mistakes! I will make enough mistakes already without making foolish mistakes!

On the other hand, thinking about aging, it can be a very sad experience. I can remember thinking returning after my Mother’s funeral 13 years ago (in the fall) and looking at the falling leaves and thinking that it is too bad that our (human) passing from this life can’t be as beautiful as the leaves of the death of summer.

63 is one of “those” ages. It isn’t a landmark age and doesn’t qualify you for anything (driving, social security etc.), it simply means I am a year older. Next year will be fun when I can reflect on “When I’m 64”. When that song was popular, I can still recall never really believing that I would someday be 64!

Actually, I do enjoy the “senior citizen discounts” . I don’t feel any sense of entitlement for them, but I do enjoy them. As I just mentioned to someone today, I was offered my first Senior Citizen discount when I was 41 years old. It was at the Shoney's in Nashville, Tennessee. I guess it must have been quite a shock, since I still can picture the scene!

I am glad that I can still jump in the car and drive on a journey, that I am still interested in new events and places, that I can still ride my bike and walk, that I still can work and not even think about retirement, obviously most of all I am glad I am still healthy (even if I could lost some weight)-63 isn’t that bad after all.

Mid-Summer

July 4 marks the middle of the Summer (more or less) and the days are definitely getting shorter as the return to winter starts.

It's actually been a great summer-hot and dry! I'm currently doing my favorite part of my day, sitting out on the back yard drinking coffee and enjoying the morning. Usually I am listening to music on my ipod, although sometimes I just enjoy the sounds of nature. There are a lot of bird and insect sounds. (Any snake sounds and I scurry inside!) When I sit out here in the evening, I don't listen to anything but the cicadas, birds etc.

(Later evening): Sitting outside tonight on my back yard, I just saw a deer feeding among the trees! Also, the birds have finally gotten used to me sitting outside and come to feed at the bird feeder as long as I don't make any sudden moves.