My Mother's LIfe, from the Perspective of the 15th Anniversary of her death

15 years ago today, I received a phone message from my mother, and she ended the message with a kind of gasp. I called back and didn't get an answer.  It didn't alarm me much because I assumed she had fallen asleep.

The next morning I called and when I didn't get an answer I called my brother in law and my sister checked and found she had died either during the night or that morning  

Later we found she had called all of us children, and many of her friends and relatives like she knew it was her last day.

The services were in Soldier, Kansas, near where we lived on a farm near Holton, Kansas for many years.  When I was a child, I remember visiting the Soldier Cemetery on Memorial Day to visit the graves of my Grandfather and Grandmother.  The Soldier Community is a unique small Community which maintains the Cemetery in pristine condition and also maintain a community center.  The people in the community still provide a lunch on Memorial Day and provide catering for funerals.  It is a very unique city.  We visit and find the tradition continues, the Cemetery is in excellent shape and the community center, with the outside playground, is still in excellent shape.

The week of the funeral was beautiful fall weather.  As I watched the leaves turn, I wondered why the end of human life couldn't be as beautiful as the end of Summer.  My Mom would have appreciated the fact that an American Indian presided at the services and he told stories about her life he learned from talking with all of us about her life.  

15 years later, I still have a problem reviewing the papers of her early life, with all the hopes and dreams of the young.  I review them and I think it makes me see her more as the individual person she was rather than my mother, which she also was.  

 It is difficult to imagine that 15 years have gone by since that day in 1997.  As I age, I appreciate more and more both what Mom and Dad went through, although I can't imagine how they did it with seven children to care for.  

The Invisible Man

(With apologies for H.G. Wells and Ralph Ellison).

As I continue to prepare for my "Ride with the Summer" (from Mexico to Canada) in either 2014 or 2015, I have started riding in the daytime in addition to my normal riding early in the morning.  I plan on training to do a 15 mile ride in October and next summer be prepared to do one of the week long rides of 50 miles or so per day (Free Wheel in Oklahoma or Ride across Kansas or Ride Across Tennessee) to help me prepare.

Since I am not used to riding with substantial traffic, I reviewed the guidelines and quickly realized I need to "act like vehicles don't see me".  The very first day I found value in that concept.  Another not even close to creating any problems, a vehicle made a left turn in front of me and probably didn't even see me.  This was in spite of my bright "high visibility yellow" shirt, and flashing lights etc.

I started "commuting" to the gym each morning, but that is in the dark with little traffic.  Riding in the daylight with substantial traffic is a new experience for me, since this is the first time in several years I have ventured to right the bike in the daylight.  I realized 2014 or 2015 would be here fast, plus I just enjoy it.

I am asked about getting bored while riding the bike.  Actually, I almost never get bored.  Many letters and memos have been "written" while I was on the bike!  I just need to return and write what I composed in my head!

In the early morning, I normally wear my iPod and listen to music.  (I listen to audiobooks while I walk in the morning.)

I am currently riding about 60 minutes per day, plus 36 minutes on the stationary bike and 32 minutes of walking.  This was over the Labor Day weekend and included 42 minutes of bike riding during the day in addition to my normal morning ride.  I don't feel like I have time time to ride as much as I need to to prepare for my "Ride with the Summer", but I'll do what I can!  

Bike Commuting

I have been "commuting" on my bike for several weeks now.  It has been an interesting experience even though it is a short "commute" since it is from my house to the gym early in the morning, not to the office!

I take my walk, and then ride my bike to the gym to (I know, this sounds strange) to ride the stationary bike while I read my newspapers for the day.  Fortunately I have a great paper carrier who gets my papers to me early.  

I finally resolved the Wall Street Journal problem and it is delivered with the local paper, so I have plenty to read while I am riding the stationary bike!

I have quickly gotten addicted (in a positive sense) to my bike commute each morning and look forward to it.  Traffic is not a major problem (this is about 3:45 to 4 a.m.) and I am "well lit" by flashing lights and reflective clothing.  I think I look forward to my walk (about 30 minutes) prior to the bike ride and bike ride as a way to reflect.  

As I mentioned to someone recently, a lot of memos, letters and e-mails are written while I walk and ride the bike, I just have to write them down when I get back!

I love listening to music while I ride.  I know I'm really not supposed to, but I do use earplugs that I can hear traffic with. 

I listen to non-fiction books while I walk and music while I ride my bike.  

65!

My 65th birthday has come and gone, and I am now "65".  Actually had a nice birthday, really don't feel older.  Actually I have been so busy with a variety of projects I haven't had time to post.

I think the worst thing about getting older is you really realize the limitations of time, how little time you have to explore new worlds and really learn how to do something.  There are a number of computer programs I'd love to learn, many books sitting on my desk (well, really, the floor) I'd love to read, magazines that I toss without reading because the next issue is here etc.  

While I'm not even close to thinking about retiring, I like the idea that in a few years I may have the time to investigate and learn more.  Of course, I wonder if I will care when I have what some people have told me is "every day is a Saturday"!  Somehow, I have have a feeling I will be just as pushed for time when I retire as new projects arise to fill the time.  I have always assume that what makes time so valuable is how little there is of it, but from what I have seen if you have a variety of interests you can never get bored.  

Time Warp

As I approach my 65th birthday, I still have a hard time realizing I will actually be 65 years old.  All my life, I have thought about 2012 being some mythical time when I would be 65 and officially old.  I may be officially old.... but

Of course, I am approaching 65 shortly, and I don't feel old.  Other people might perceive me as old, and in real terms, I will be old, but I hardly think or feel like I thought 65 years old would feel when I was (say) in the seventh grade.

It was five years ago that I wrote that in "ten years I would be 70".  It is almost like a time warp that five years have went by in such a short time!  Certainly the time from when I was in the 8th grade and now is definitely like a time warp.

Fortunately I don't feel any need to act, dress or think "young".  I hope I think, act and dress as I want to and not "young" or "old".  

Unlike my Dad, my views and feelings in many areas have changed significantly and differing from the way older age affects how people perceive the world.  It's not necessarily bad or good, just the way it is.  

Above all, I have tried to keep my thinking and behavior flexible so I can adjust to changing conditions while have a hard backbone of core beliefs that do not change.  I guess only people who know me can advise if I succeeded or not.  

I think the hardest thing about living life is that options close as you get older, normally starting around the mid-thirties.  I  suddenly realize that an option is no longer available and I don't necessarily feel sad about it, but I realize it is what it is.  

Bicycle Commuter

This is my start of my training for my "follow the summer" ride I plan on making in two years.  I need to get used to biking in traffic.

This morning I decided to "commute" to the gym by bike rather than drive.  (Hardly a major decision since it is only a mile or so.)  The expected hassles of locking my bike, taking care of the helmet etc. were not exceptional and I enjoyed it.

It may seem a little weird to bike to the gym to ride the stationary bike, but that (riding the stationary bike) is when I read the morning papers.  

I have been a newspaper reader since I was in the 7th grade, and it is one of the more enjoyable moments of my day.  

40 pounds!

This morning I weighed myself and found I have lost 40 lbs since the day after Christmas!

I am pleased, and primarily because I am not really on a "diet" that I will eventually get off of.  It is just the way I eat and live, which hopefully means I can maintain it well.  My actual goal is to lose about 15 more pounds, but it doesn't really matter.  My main goal is to not gain it back!  I have a significant investment in new clothes to provide an incentive, but the best incentive is the way I feel

In the Midst of Chaos

This has been a really busy summer for a number of both personal and work reasons.  Yes, I love it!  There have been some challenges and that is what living is all about.

I was thinking this morning of the events in the day I have really come to value, which includes my early morning 35 minute walk, (listening to a non-fiction book, normally on a subject I normally wouldn't read about) outside bike ride on may bike and then I go to ATC (Around the Clock) fitness to ride the stationary bike for 35 minutes while I read the daily papers (Commercial Appeal and WSJ, except I add the NY Times on Friday, Saturday and Sunday) and listen to music on my ancient iPods  The three "gumstick" iPods are at least 6 years old and appear to still have a strong battery.  Thank goodness, because it costs more than they are worth to replace the battery!  I found that the new "shuffle" iPods are near as good as the original "gumstick" ones are.

Then I have my 27 minute nap (why 27 minutes, I don't know) and then, weather permitting, I sit out on the wonderful patio and work as I listen to the wind blow through the woods in back of my house.

Small pleasures but essential!  Then I eat my oatmeal and blueberries and head off for work.

I don't have any similar rituals at night, or even during the day, except for my coffee, so that is probably one reason I treasure the early morning hours and keep waking up earlier and earlier!

Moon Day revisited

Friday, July 20, 2012:

Another Friday!  Sitting on the patio on a beautiful Friday morning. I love the patio in the early morning, the cool breeze and the noise of the forest behind the house.

On July 20, 1969, I was in San Antonio Texas (Lackland AFB) going through basic training in the Air Force.  I had started July 15, 1969, so it was still a very new experience!  We got "off" that day since it was "moon day", but it wasn't really like  day off! I didn't have any idea of the experiences yet to come (both good and bad).

Also, throughout my life "65" years has always been some kind of threshold, so the year 2012 always had a special fascination with me.  Now, I find out it is really just another year and (hopefully) "65 years old" will be just another age.  

OMG, I'm 65!, part 1

Within three weeks, I will be 65 (August 6).  It is a shock to say the least, although I can't say I didn't know it was coming nor am I really upset about it.  It is what it is.  In a lot of ways, I feel lucky.  I am relatively healthy, I have a job I enjoy and thrive at, I enjoy my house and basally enjoy my life.  I was also very lucky to meet and marry Aliene over 15 years ago!

When I was a child, I remember how adults mentioned how the years sped by and I fully realize now what they meant!  I have to admit, I don't consider 65 "old" anymore and the age I consider "old" has gotten older each year!

Years ago I thought I would be retired either at or before 65.  Now, I can't imagine myself being retired and hope to work until at least 70, assuming I still enjoy my job and am relatively healthy.

Trying to decide about Medicare and all of the options.  Since I am covered by the City of Lakeland group health insurance, I don't need it but realize the possible danger in not getting it now.

The Countdown to Age 65 has started.  I'll see how I feel as the dreaded age approaches!

Courter Reunion 2012

Left on Wednesday for Courter Reunion 2012.  Scattered rain throughout the trip, nothing bad.  Aliene, Kali and Katherine.  After initial qualms decided to drive our car with over 100,000 miles (which we trust all the same!) instead of a rental vehicle.

Overall trip went fine, one delay.  Stopped at RubyTuesday's in Russellville Arkansas, where I had my usual meat loaf with garden bar and snap peas.  Longer wait than usual.  As I mentioned, Ruby Tuesday has my 3rd favorite meat loaf, with the # ! being Aliene's and # 2 being Crackerbarrel.

Arrived at our favorite hotel, Hampton Inn at Exit 55 in Clarksville too late to swim.  They have a wonderful swimming pool here.  They left some peanut butter cookies (my favorite) in the room and I break my eating plan (no cookies usually) for these!  They are wonderful.  (We stay here a lot on our way back and forth from Oklahoma City. I highly recommend it if you are ever in the area.

Thursday, July 12, 2012:  Woke up at 3:06 a.m., didn't want to get up too early since driving through to Topeka.  Got up at 4:06 a.m. and worked, responded to e-mails etc.

Breakfast at Hampton Inn, headed for OKC to pick up Angela.  Stopped at the Oklahoma Welcome Center (as normal), the "Fiesta Convenience Store" at exit 278 and the Love's at exit 200.

Got to OKC early, went to Penn Square (Where Kali and Katherine shopped at Justice), lunch at Jimmy's Egg (where I used the last of a gift card I received for Christmas).  Aliene to hair appt.

Angela's car is having transmission problems, so picked her up at transmission shop

On to Topeka in a crowded car!.  Gas at the Loves at 122th Street and then on to Topeka with only one stop at the New Haven Turnpike spot.  On the turnpike, averaged 80 mph with light traffic, so a good trip!

Arrived at Topeka around 8:20 p.m., happened to drive in right behind Kim and Jerry (my Brother in Laws) and met Rebecca (my niece) and Margaret (sister) as they were getting out of their car!. Shortly after, met Eleanor (sister) and Rebecca's dogs!

Settled into room, Target for water etc.

Friday, July 13, 2012:

Up at 3:36 a.m., worked on e-mail etc.  Clubhouse Inn, Topeka, Kansas # 108

Pavilion, around 6 a.m., Eleanor there.  Jerry joined, then Rebecca, Kim, etc.

Breakfast, Clubhouse Inn

Rain most of morning, visited etc.

West Ridge Mall, lunch at Chick-Fil-a (Cow, got free entree for wearing hat).  Aliene, Angela and girls shopped at Justice etc.

Swim with Katherine.

Visited, Supper at On the Border

Visited at hotel with Aliene, Margaret, Eleanor, Barbara, Mary Ann, Mary Lou, John etc.

Saturday, July 14, 2012:

Up at 4:01 a.m., worked, checked e-mail etc.  Joined the early morning crowd on the Pavilion and visited.  Ate breakfast at hotel.  Pavilion Crowd included, Eleanor, Jerry, John, Rebecca, Margaret.

Visited most of morning as Kenneth, Aunt Eleanor, Chuck and Le Ann arrived.  Lunch at Chipolta. (sp).  Surprised that they are glutton free.  Excellent food.

Visited afternoon. Saturday night supper at Cieras (sp) Italian.

Sunday, July 15, 2012:

Early morning crew at Pavilion again.  Jerry, Eleanor, Margaret, John, etc.  Breakfast, hotel.

Visited, then lunch at Cracker Barrel.  Actually had some of the chicken which was excellent.

Courter Reunion pictures and meeting etc.

Holton (Soldier cemetery) with Eleanor and Aliene.  Snack at Trails Inn.  Always amazed at how active the little town of Soldier is and how they maintain their park and cemetery.

Supper at Chipolta.  Swim with Kali and Katherine, then visit around pavilion.

Worked, caught up on some paperwork, ready to return to the real world!

Monday, July 16, 2012:  

Clubhouse Inn.  Up early, breakfast, pack and say goodbye's to the persons left.  

Drive down Kansas Turnpike (I-35) went well, light traffic.  Stopped in Guthrie for gas, girls wanted to eat at Arby's, so I tried a salad.  Not bad.

Returned Angela and girls safely, headed for Exit 55.  Stopped in Alma, Arkansas for "last supper" at Braums (I even had a medium strawberry shake!)

Arrived at exit 55 (Hampton Inn, Clarksville, Arkansas).  Went swimming in their wonderful pool.  Upgraded to room with whirlpool, which is nice.

Up at 3:30 am., headed for Lakeland

Arrived in Lakeland, ate breakfast, headed for office.

Courter Reunion 2012 is over.  

The Courter Reunion is always kind of a yardstick for me, I think since it is so close to my birthday and it is the start of the end of Summer.  I have actually attended (I believe) continuously since 1988.  

It was a nice reunion.  I like the laid back atmosphere where you can sit and talk with one (or more) persons for a long period of time, take a break etc.  It is always somewhat of a bittersweet feeling, since you know you probably won't see most of them (or any) for a year.

I'll add some pictures.

Summer of 2012

The Summer of 2012 is almost 50% over (for all intents and purposes!).  It has been busy, I haven't kept up with my blog, diary or other notes!  I didn't do my June 21 beginning/ending of summer.

However, I AM in my favorite summer place.  Sitting on my patio in the early morning reading, drinking coffee (and water) and working on my computer!  Not quite as poetic as "Standing on the Corner in Winslow, Arizona", but I think of it during the long winter and decide to enjoy every moment of it in the summer!  Aliene and I actually went to see the "Standing on the Corner in Winslow, Arizona".  The City (or Chamber) have quite a promotion of the song!  I'm tying to think of a poetic way of describing my favorite early summer pastime, but I haven't some up with anything yet.

I enjoy the hot summer, heat doesn't bother me a bit.  I am enjoying the Summer of 2012 and only wish I had more spare time!

I was glad to see a deer in the "forest' in back of my patio the other morning, I thought maybe the development had scared off all of the deer.

The last suits?

One of the "good" "bad" results of losing weight is having to buy more clothes.  And more clothes!

I have had to buy 2 suits, new belts, shirts, slacks etc. to the tune of a substantial amount of money.  It is fun to find "new" "old" clothes that I saved for "when I lose weight" and it has actually happened, but I didn't save enough and I didn't realize how old they were.

The thought crossed my mind that this could be the last suit I will ever buy, considering my age.   Although I hope to keep working for at least 6 more years, (and living for many more than that)  I don't wear suits every day, so they could last for a considerable period of time.  The slacks, shirts etc. probably (or should I say hopefully!) will be replaced since they will wear out, although I still occasionally wear my 40 year old cowboy boots, and some 30 year old shirts and coats!

I did pick some sizes that will allow me to lost more weight (my goal is another 20 lbs) and hopefully not have to replace everything!

Thoughts on Bull Frogs and aging

The bullfrogs are croaking on my morning walks/bike rides again, which to me indicates that Spring and Summer is coming!  I have heard the first croaking in the past week, and I know warm (and hot) weather is coming!

It also means it is the summer I will turn 65 years old.  I never really thought 65 years old would feel like this (although I won't really know until my birthday and I actually tell someone I am 65 years old-I still haven't gotten used to telling people I'm over 50 years old!

Not that I regret turning 65 years old, it is just a fact.  I just hope I can continue to enjoy life for as long as it is a quality life.

I am glad I have continued my exercise, reading and working.  I walk approximately 1/2 hour every morning, then ride my bike (most mornings) and then go one to the gym (which is 1/2 mile away) and read the morning paper while I ride the stationary bike at a slow speed.  I still enjoy reading a physical paper while I am at home, although I have gotten used to reading newspapers on the internet while I am traveling away from home.

Aliene and I started watching our "carbs" right after Christmas.  Since the day after Christmas I have lost over 30 libs, which make me feel good.   Also, I have "grown into" some clothes I had previously grown out of, which makes me feel good.  Aliene has lost about 16 lbs, which is even better than me considering the relative weights.

While I enjoy all of the technology and the "social media" etc., I have found I don't write in my blog near as often for obvious reasons and I miss it.

Wonderful Spring day today!  Actually wore scandals, shorts and t-shirt and enjoyed being outside!  Wonderful to feel the Spring come, although it certainly hasn't been a bad Winter.

What is especially good, as I lose weight, I come into a whole new wardrobe of clothes that I haven't been able to wear for years, but always kept because someday....  Maybe "someday" is finally here!  I lost weight by what I call a "modified" low carb diet.  I rarely eat potatoes or bread and avoid foods with high carbs, although I do continue to eat oatmeal and blueberries (my favorite breakfast), which is relatively high in carbs and I eat a lot of high carb fruit and vegetables.  Although I haven't bothered to look through all of the details, I understand that the carbs in bread, potatoes and sugary foods are worse than the carbs in vegetables and fruit since they are a lot faster hitting your bloodstream.

Anyway, I think it is a eating pattern I can continue without any real problem.

I noticed I haven't been "blogging" much lately.  I think it is partly because of the many other opportunities (that still take your time since as Facebook, Twitter etc. and partly because it has just really been busy.

Winter Thoughs

As happens every year, I am amazed at how fast the year goes. Already almost March!

Of course, that also means the days are getting longer and Spring is coming! In spite of the fact it has been a mild winter, I am ready for Spring and Summer to arrive!

Today, it is cold (for here, 31 degrees), but sunny, so it should be a nice Presidents Day.

Although it seems a holiday and a vacation day should be the same thing, I like Holidays much better. If I get a call on a holiday, I know it normally is an emergency! On Vacation Days, I feel like I need to check phone calls etc. (I do on Holidays also, but I rarely get any on Holidays!)

Some of the Crocus flowers (they probably are something else, but I think of them as Crocus) are already blooming, probably to be frozen in place by at least one more freeze before winter is over!

Weight goal is reached!

I was pleased to note at my "weigh in" today, I reached my Weightwatchers weight goal! Of course, it just means I set another step goal (on to my final goal), but I am excited about reaching it.

I have been on "on line" weightwatchers for several years with some success, but also weight gains. The day after Christmas, I went on a very modified "low carb" diet. Basically I cut out potatoes and bread and many sweets (with high carbs). I was pleased at the results, especially since it is an eating plan I can continue as a "permanent" eating plan.

I was surprised at how may carbs fruits etc. had (although when I think about it, it makes sense), but I did learn that these are "good carbs".

I am continuing my exercise also, which I expect helps.

On to my next goal!

Jury Duty 2/6/12

Last December, I was called for a "Jury call". I drove down expecting 300 people or so, but there were per 3,500 of us!! I realized it when there was a traffic jam near the building where I was supposed to report to!

It was actually handled exceptionally well, and I was a assigned a week to report and advised basically unless I was dead or in the hospital, I was expected to report.

I have never been on a Jury before and have all of the thoughts about how good our jury system is, so it has been an exciting time (even if I am hungry, bored and hoping I can go to the bathroom!).

I get a whole $11 per day, which has to pay for parking ($6), lunch (who knows) and driving down here. (The gas to drive down here costs at least $6.)

Monday, February 6, 2012:

Jury duty this morning. Rushed to get here on time, sat for a two hour "orientation". Called five juries and I wasn't called yet! Now, 11:17 a.m., hopefully will make it until after lunch and then they may cut me loose for the day.

Rather interesting. The person doing the orientation is exceptionally good and they had a Judge (Judge Ward) stop by and kind of give a pep talk. My "hotspot" came in handy as they have a desk for computers, but no Wi Fi. I am sitting here hoping my hotspot and computer has enough battery power to keep going until I get home! Tomorrow, I'll being my electric cords!

Actually enjoying the free time to work without interruptions (although I did check for messages and check e-mail).

This entry will be continued.

Monday, Feb 6 (continued): At lunch in downtown Memphis (a BBQ place, but I had catfish.

Of course, called for jury duty immediately after lunch. Selected for jury, but can't comment it on it further until after Jury Duty complete.

Actually, I have been very impressed by the jury process in Shelby County. The Administrators are very professional and the Judges go out of their way to be fair and discuss the jury process.

Coffee Filters and Razor Blades

As 2012 starts (yes, I know, I have not kept up my blog, too many other distractions), I think of ways I measure time besides days or years.

In the early morning as I make my coffee, I look at the large pile of filters and think about the future represented in those filters? Where will I be and what will have happened by the time the stack of filters is used up? What changes will I have made, been made for me?

Strange to think of the future as represented by the use of the coffee filters, usually one each day. I don't even know how many filters are in a stack, probably 500 or so. I take a stack that seems like a bunch, but is manageable. Each time I get a new stack I think about what has happened and what the new stack will bring.

I don't remember when I started drinking coffee, probably in college. My parents were coffee drinkers, although they tended towards (if I remember right) decaffeinated coffee, which I don't really consider coffee.

I am lucky that I can drink a cup of coffee and fall asleep. I love drinking coffee and frequently drink coffee throughout the day, after starting the day with eight cups of coffee before I go to work (well, I don't really consider the coffee as measured by the coffee maker a true "cup", but, whatever). Also, it's not really 8 cups, since rarely finish the coffee.

I love hot, fresh, coffee and absolutely hate old and cold coffee. I don't hesitate to send coffee back if it is too cold or old (usually both) and also never hesitate (after breakfast time) to ask if the "coffee is fresh" and refuse to order coffee (just water please) if the sever doesn't brighten up and say "I'll make a fresh pot". I figure if I pay $2.50 for a cup of coffee, they can make it fresh or at least have fresh coffee!

My favorite coffee? At home, Starbucks "French Roast" is the only way to go. (I'm putting a coffee pot of my own at the office so I can have it at work also).

As far as eating out coffee, Starbucks, McDonalds and Steak n Shake are all excellent. TGIFridays coffee tastes like it is instant and I quit ordering it . (TGIFridays dose have excellent sweet tea). Cracker Barrel coffee is excellent as long as it is fresh and hot.

I LOVE the Starbucks ice coffee, especially in summer. I do have to avoid driving after I have a refill though, the only time I get a light "coffee high"!

Razor blades-I measure the past through razor blades. This started in college when the "disposable" razors first came out. I was so poor that I cabbaged onto some of the free disposable razors and used them literally months at a time. (Maybe why I grew a beard for awhile!)

Whenever I replaced one, I would think about what happened in the past, the time measured by the razor. Years ago, I got tired of the disposable razors and went to a razor blade with disposable blades. Now I change the blade every "regular meeting" of the Lakeland Board of Commissioners, which is once a month. It makes me change it before it gets too bad, plus it provides me with a measuring device.

Such are my thoughts in the early morning, before the everyday world starts and time is measured in hours, minutes and seconds!

Hope all who read this are having a wonderful 2012!

Two Homeless Men in Starbucks

I had coffee with two homeless men in Starbucks tonight. Not really “had coffee”, but they were in Starbucks when I was. (They didn’t buy anything, but they did eat a sandwich they bought in and washed it down with what looked like gin, or maybe it was a bottle of water.)

They were quiet and courteous. They unloaded their possessions, actually enough to seriously impede their mobility, and, I couldn’t help but notice, quite nice luggage (actually gym type bags.)

Of course everyone carefully ignored them and they didn’t bother anyone, except to ask someone if it was supposed to rain.

It is rainy and cold (and most of all, windy) here (in Oklahoma City) and I suddenly thought how I don’t like rain and wind as an inconvenience, it is really important if you are homeless.

I couldn’t remember the last time I thought of a homeless person as other than someone I see walking down the street, asking for money at the intersections or asking me for money as I carefully avoided looking at him or her.

Actually, the last time I probably associated with homeless persons was when I was in college and working summers in Denver. I came from an extremely small town and probably had never been in a city as big as Denver. I came out to work at a summer job in a Samsonite Factory. (I can still do the moves I did on the assembly line.)

My Mom gave me a check to sustain myself until I got my first paycheck, and, of course, no one was about to cash a check from a city they had never heard of before!

I actually slept in the bus station and other areas for several days until the bank associated with Samsonite finally cashed the check and my parents sent me some more money! Actually, I never had any problems, although I kept my distance also.

I still probably won’t look at homeless people any differently and I still resent being asked for money. Years ago, I started adding a little extra on tips to servers etc., but I refuse to succumb to what I consider to be extortion of someone asking me for money on the street.

I decided a long time ago, I’d give a little extra to help working people, but not panhandlers. I realize probably a percentage actually really, really need the help, but I just don’t like being approached asking for money. It isn’t just Memphis, I’ve been approached on a regular basis in Lakeland at gas stations. Maybe I’m not thinking about it in Lakeland, so I look more like I might give, but I especially resent it when I am approached late at night, it is too much like a robbery attempt. I probably should give something just on the basis that I may be helping someone who really does need it, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I’m much rather continue adding a dollar or two the tips to people who work and are trying to help themselves.

It was an interesting experience and certainly gave me a more personal experience with the current group of homeless people (I have a feeling the ones I saw tonight were some of the “new” homeless, who may have had a good job, owned their own home and never thought they would be homeless, in the recent past. It is easy to look at them and see myself in their place and question my thoughts on this and my policy of not giving money to panhandlers.

As I am reminded, given an unlucky break here and there, it could just as easily be me.

The Extra Hour

Every year when Daylight Savings Time returns and we get an "extra hour", I skidder around and try to find a use for the "extra hour" and the entire day seems somehwhat strange, but good. I like the feel of having an "extra" hour, and somehow the day move a little slower.

I always like it when the time "falls back" or I go west to the time zones when the time falls back. I am always a little unsettled about going an hour ahead. When DST "springs forward", I really don't mind, since we get an extra hour of evening!

37 years!

37 years ago (October 21, 1974), I walked into the Liberal, Kansas City Hall to start my first day of what has turned into a municipal career. The City Manager showed me my office (I was impressed I actually got my own office!) and advised me he wanted a grant for improvement of an area of town and to improve housing. (At the time, Liberal had a housing shortage).

The years since then have gone by in a blur. I think a major change has been that many decisions that in the early years I would have agonized over, I started to make almost without thinking, and my instincts and reading of peoples behavior have significantly increased to a point I find amazing (I also don’t say a lot about it). I think that must be one of the major benefits of experience.

Looking back, I find it is difficult to write about. I started working with grant programs for about eight years, when I assumed my first City Manager job, more of a change than you think it would be. My first few years as City Manager, I read and read about different technical aspects of a city, as well as leadership techniques etc. (Now that I think about it, I still do!).

I found most elected officials really are honest and hard working and their major interest is for the community as a whole, not personal interests. I actually saw more elected officials vote against their personal interest at times then I did vote for something that would benefit them.

The most dangerous elected official? The “single purpose” elected official whose only interest is the advancement of a personal idea, concept or group and with no interest in being fair to all parties.

Probably the biggest benefit I have had from my career is knowing and working with many of the persons who served their communities in either elected or appointed positions.

I like to say I played “City Manager” when I was a child and I developed cities with police and fire departments, public works, airfields etc. Of course I didn’t call it that but that is what I was doing.

I realized had found my career when I was asked at a Toastmasters meeting what I would do if I won the lottery or otherwise suddenly had enough money to not work. I thought about it and said I’d go to work the next day and continue to do what I loved.

I know there won’t be another 37 years. I do wish I could start again 37 years ago with what I know now!

I remember after several months I was standing in line in a movie theatre and as I looked around me, I realize that what I did for the city (little as it was) contributed to the daily happiness of the people, I actually felt a chill down my back and tears come to my eyes as I thought about how the City affects the daily lives of it’s residents.

And that is why I am still working for city government for 37 years and, other than wishing I had made better decisions at times (which is how I got experience), I don’t regret spending my career working for cities and I can’t imagine a better career than City Manager.

Fall of 2011

Fall of 2011

Summer of 2011 is over and the Fall has be gorgeous thus far, but I still miss Summer and I know that winter is coming. In all fairness, Winter isn’t that bad in Lakeland, but it still is cold and there are no leaves on the trees etc.

A while since I have written, probably one of the longest since I started keeping a written journal in the Summer of 1987. (Can it have been that long ago!?) I still keep a daily journal of my basic activities, but I don’t write my thoughts down on a daily basis.

I keep thinking I will start writing daily observations, but life gets in the way. I will make an attempt to jot some observations down (written on paper, not just in the computer) today.

I recently attended the International City Managers Conference, and I thought how a conference is something like life. You look forward to it, it gets here before you expect, and by the time you learn your way around, it is over (or almost over)!

The last few days have been beautiful.

Overall things are going well. Aliene had pneumonia recently, which with her condition is bad, since she can’t take antibiotics without some serious side effects. Then after she started feeling better again, her back and leg started hurting again. Same problem as with the pneumonia, she can’t take much of the pain medicine.

I am still walking in the morning, then an “outside” bike ride on my now trusty six year old Trek (it has been a super bike, although I don’t get anything but a mountain bike in the future) and then, something relatively new, I go over to the ATC (Around the Clock) gym and read the morning paper while I ride the stationary bike.

You would think I would start losing weight, but....my eating still is tempting!.

I am going to try to write more often and less wordy, so I’ll stop for now and post this.

Written October 15, 2011 in Lakeland, Tennessee

Summer of 2011-cooling down!

72 degrees this morning when I got up! It almost seems cold out here.

It is the time of year I hate to see arrive. My favorite spot, my back patio, is almost too cool to sit out and work/read in the early morning! I always kind of dread this time of year since at times during the summer it seems like it will last forever.

I am treasuring the last few days that I can sit out on my patio and work/read and listen to music on my ipod.

I decided to listen to my entire classical library this summer during the early morning and I am now on 398 of 567 (Oddly enough, Vivaldi " Summer" of the Four Seasons is playing right now. Even more oddly, much as I hate Winter, my favorite of the Four Seasons is "Winter" with Autumn a close second. In reality my favorite seasons (in order) are Summer, Spring, Autumn and Winter (a long fourth!).

Time for another early morning session to end and another week to start.

Now I'm 64 (sung to the tune of "When I'm 64"

Now I’m 64:

Four years ago, on my 60th Birthday, I commented that “in ten years I’d be 70”. I am now 4 years into the 10 years to my 70th birthday, something that seemed so far off at that time.

Today it is July 5, 2010 and, as I sit outside and listen to the thousands (if not millions) of tree frogs coming in waves over me as I nap, I thought about what it means (or will mean) to be 64.

Tree frogs, as cicadas, are almost a comfort noise for me. I feel a sense of well being when I hear the sound of numerous tree frogs or cicadas (just one or several would drive me nuts, but the sound of the many is comforting and almost a nostalgic feeling.

In a month, August 6, 2011, I’ll be 64 years old. Just a number in a lot of ways, I really don’t dread it or even really have any major feelings about it, except it is a signpost I am passing on my way through life.

I recently read that “age destroys what it creates” and I instantly grasped the truth of it. I see it in the faces of people I have known most, if not all of my life, and I especially notice it in people I haven’t seen for awhile.

As I grow older, I realize how fast life is, and I see it most in the growth of children. That is one of the most amazing things, to see a child turn into an adult and I realize how short of a time it really is.

This will probably be too long, most of you will probably never read the entire note, since this is only the first day (I know better than to say I will write “every day”, but I will write periodically and post this on my 64th Birthday on August 6.

Since the Courter Family Reunion is in July, I expect to especially notice the passage of time. For the past 30 or so years, the annual Family Reunion has been a marker and an important part of my life, as my brothers and sisters and I move from the “youngsters” to the “Senior Generation’.

30 years ago, I wondered how I would feel when my Dad and Mom were gone. It seemed impossible that it would happen. Now I know how I feel and I know it does happen.

I even notice it in minor possessions. I look in disbelief at hats that are 30 years old, my cowboy boots that are at least 32 years old, t-shirts that I got for running/walking in “runs/walks” since 1988 etc. Where did the time go?

I listen to the tree frogs and cicadas and wish this moment would last longer. Perhaps by writing about it, I feel I will make the moment last longer. Not forever, winter will will come, but longer.

July 6, 2011: In one month, I will be 64 years old. No real thoughts on it today, probably because it was one of “those” days part of the day, when I just wish the day would get over. One thing about the City Manager profession, while of course there will always be cities who consider an applicant “too old”, generally, age (and experience) is respected in many cities and I have known City Managers in their 80’s get a job as City Manager.

One thing I have found as I grow older, time becomes more valuable than almost anything. Many activities I did in the past, I have stopped doing since I don’t want to take the time to do it.

July 31, 2011: Received a card today from my insurance agent. It is worth noting the following items were invented/started in 1947 (64 years ago)

-Ajax Cleanser

-Transistor (by Bell Labs)

-Tape recorder for home

-Almond Joy candy bar

-Zoom lens

-Network news

-Radar for commercial and private planes

-First U.S. ballistic missile was fired

What would really surprise me I expect is to see what has been invented since my youngest granddaughter was born in 2002, and certainly since my daughter was born in 1979!

I can remember buying one of the first transistor radios (for $20-I put .50 on it in “layaway”) and my first computer (a Vic 20) in 1981 or so and my first “real” computer (a PC clone without a hard drive!) in 1986. The advancements since then never fail to amaze (and please) me as I wonder how I ever got along without a computer, iphone, ipad, GPS etc.!

One area I am disappointed in is that when I was young, I never thought I would be driving the same basic car (yes, much advanced, but still the same basic car) and not using “jet packs” or “transporting” myself to get places! Even airplanes haven’t changed much. I remember attending a meeting over 12 years ago where I was advised the technology exists to walk out to your airplane, and, completely through computer control, fly to your destination. I wonder why the advancements are so slow in that area?

August 6, 2011: Today I am now officially 64 years old. (I believe as of about 5:28 a.m. this morning!)

Soon I will stop thinking (or at least responding, I don’t think of myself as being in my sixties!) of myself as “63” and now I will be saying “64” with the same sense of disbelief that “Now I’m 64!”

July 18, 2011

I just passed the anniversary of when I started basic training in the Air Force and didn't even think about it (July 15) as did the day I was discharged (Friday, July 13 since the 15th was on a Sunday!). Time passes.

Summer of 2011 is about halfway over. This morning, I realized the days were already getting shorter, but I'll enjoy the summer while it is here!

One of the primary activities I enjoy about summer is sitting outside on my patio either reading or working (thank goodness for wi fi!). I enjoy not having to dress for cold weather, I love hot weather.

The birds clog the feeders (yes I now have two with room for a third). I fear I have made a bunch of dependent birds, dependent on me remembering to get the food out in the morning. I try to arrange for enough food when I am out of town overnight, but I really feel a sense of guilt! I am sure they find food someplace, but I still feel a slight sense of guilt.

I enjoy the "forest" in back, but early in the morning when I walk, I hear sounds from the forest and nearby indicating that life is probably rough in the forest for the wildlife. (Such as some animals becoming food etc.-I won't get into it anymore than that.)

I enjoy each day of summer, but it is going by so fast it is becoming a blur. It is already time for the Courter Reunion, which has always, to me, meant the end of summer and the start of school. Of course, in reality, at least in Lakeland, I enjoy summer weather for at least three more months and frequently well into September.

Summer of 2011 is here!

My favorite day, June 21, the first day of SUMMER!!

I am sitting outside (in a slightly cool breeze tonight) listening to the summer sounds and enjoying the thoughts of the summer to come.

The birds (at least most of them) won't come to the feeders (yes, I now have two feeders for my spoiled birds), so they are probably mad.

Slightly hidden in my subconscious are thoughts that today is the longest day of the year and it only goes downhill from here until June 21, 2012! However, I will enjoy the next four or five months of nice weather for my early morning walks, bike rides and just sitting out on the patio enjoying the weather.

Occasionally, I'll take the time to just sit back and think about what will happen in the next year, the next ten years and life in general. I take a moment from work, reading etc. and just kick back and listen to the sounds of summer and feel the breeze.

Summer of 2012 has begun and I will treasure the memories of each day.

Summer of 2011

Sitting outside, listening to the cicadas, working on stuff, reading, drinking ice tea. It doesn't get much better than this!

The only slight problem is that thought in the back of my mind that June 21 is coming and the days will start to get shorter, and winter will come but such is life.

I enjoy the early morning walk and bike ride in the early morning heat.

At times like this, it is hard to believe that winter even exists!

Wonderful time at the CMA Fest, am writing up a summary of it. Some "once in a lifetime" happenings!

Bullfrogs are here, summer is arriving! (Cicadas can't be far behind!)

After at least two years away, the Bullfrogs have finally returned to the pond in our area!

For some reason, I really enjoy the “harmony” of the bullfrogs in the early morning. (I’m not sure if our neighbors do!) I take an early morning walk and bicycle ride and I feel like the bullfrogs are welcoming in the Summer!

I really don’t know why they disappeared or why they returned, but they really add some atmosphere to my early morning walk and ride!

This morning it was also 77 degrees which at least indicates that Summer is finally here!

Another sound I always associate with summer is the cicadas. The sound fills me with memories and is one of the few sounds (in addition to bullfrogs) that don't bother me regardless of the sound.

Many evenings I actually sit outside and sleep to the sound of the cicadas.

Armadillo attack!

Snoozing this morning after my exercise, I suddenly heard a "bump" against the back door. Instantly alert, I banged on the door (for some reason) and prepared to run to the phone to call 9-1-1.

I peeked through the door when the noise stopped and saw an Armadillo taking off! This was daylight and about 6:30 in the morning (and it was my back patio, not a highway!) so it was a shock to see and it took me a second for my suddenly alert brain to realize what it was!

I tried to find where it had gone, but it had gone! Maybe best for both of us. Now I will need to find out why in the world an Armadillo was on my back patio and trying to break into our house!

Spring?

Recently I happily put on my Summer weekend/off of work clothes, shorts, t-shirt and scandals and prepared for the Summer!

However.... As usual, it got cold again, so I had to revert to other, more warmer, clothes and wait some more! However, I am enjoying the green trees, the flowers and other colorful displays of Spring.

The pear (I believe) trees are plentiful here in Lakeland and when they first come out (they are gone already), they almost seem to brighten up the night.

We have really been busy, even for the normal busiest time of the year! I always make time for exercise (walking, bike riding and, recently, riding the stationary bike while I read my other passion, the daily newspapers!). I am getting behind on my magazine and book reading and also haven't been able to keep up with some computer projects I have been working on. It seems I get up and go to bed and the times in-between are just a blur!

Graduation time is coming soon, and we are going to several COLLEGE graduations that make me realize how time passes! I remember them as little children and can't believe they are actually graduating from College!

Spring!?

Saw the first "Crocus" several weeks ago and admired all of pear trees as they bloomed. Cheered the start of Spring on March 20/21 and the 70 degree+ perfect weather.

Of course I realized the miserable weather would return, but I enjoyed the "first Spring". The pear trees in Lakeland bloom to the point that it almost seems to light up the night.

The grass is still turning green and the trees are budding, but Spring is here and I am now awaiting the "true Spring" which arrives after the coolness of April.

Smoke Detectors (again)

Another "smoke detector" went off again at 5;45 a.m. this morning. I was up, but I hate that type of smoke detector. I don't think the harassment really works, it just makes you angry and take the battery out. (I had to check my previous blog to remember to disconnect the electric connection also). We installed some electric smoke detectors with direct Fire Department access, so we don't need them anyway.

I can't believe someone actually manufactures a device like that. SURELY with all of the technology they should be able to do better!

Wasted 30 minutes and woke Aliene up killing it.

WARNING-Apple Products-Like Santa Claus, I no longer believe!

My trust in Apple products has evaporated and I feel a little like when I was a child and realized Santa Claus was a myth.

I had to reset my iPhone (due to corrupt files). I was advised that I "may lose some text messages".

NOTE: yes, I had carefully "syned" and backedup my iPhone in the belief that everything was maintained in teh backup file on the computer, exactly as I was told.

I did lose my text messages. I ALSO LOST:

-All of the information in my "apps" including my calendar etc.

-All of my "notes" I kept in the "notes" app for the past three years. It Apple Computer had advised me I was going to lose all of my notes, I could have e-mailed them and saved them.

-All of my "favorite" phone numbers and contacts

-All of my "bluetooth" connections

-I lost may of my "apps" and regained "apps" I had thought I had removed from my computer.

What really upsets me about the whole thing is that WHY WASN'T I TOLD what would happen? I could have taken precautions to save some of the information.

I no longer trust Apple products (iPhone, iPad) etc. Now I wonder if I will lose everything on my iPad also, even thought I back it up on a regular basis.

Apple Computer needs to use some its profits to better serve it's customers and advise what will happen. Surely, with all of the technology available they can take steps to make sure this doesn't happen!

An early "April Fools" from General Mills

GENERAL MILLS GIVES ME AN EARLY APRIL FOOLS!

As a Hot Wheels/Matchbox miniature car collector, I am always on the lookout for them in boxes of cereal etc.

I thought I had hit the jackpot from General Mills when I read an add about a series of 4 such cars. I quickly went to the grocery store and was pleased to see that the cereal (one of each type yet!) was still available. I carefully looked at the box to make sure it was a car “inside the box” and not a coupon to send off etc. Satisfied I quickly bought one of each for my collection.

While I normally eat oatmeal for breakfast, I dutifully started eating the General Mills cereal. As I got to the bottom of the box, I started wondering where the car was.

SURPRISE!! As I got to the bottom of the first box, I read the box again and realized it said “collect all 4 BOXES”!! This, after, suspecting a trick of some sort (I’m ashamed to say I have been burned before), I had carefully reviewed the ad and the boxes of cereal!

I just laughed about the “early April Fool” from General Mills, and vowed never to buy anything from General Mills again, but I do feel sorry for the kids who don’t realize how tricky General Mills ads and cereal boxes are.

At least it was an inexpensive lesson! And I will enjoy the cereal, but after this the other brands will do fine when I decide I want to eat “cold” cereal.

Winter Daze

It it that time of year when I just "take it one day at a time" as I wait for Spring! Actually, in spite of this being the "worst" (most adverse weather) since I moved to Lakeland, I still have managed to get most of my morning walk and bicycling in (although bicycling does get a little cold at times). I have only missed a few events because of snow and bad weather.

There is even a "good" side. I am wearing clothes I haven't worn for years since it is normally too warm (even during the winter) to wear them and I just hadn't gotten around to giving them away.

I was going through some of my clothes and I have cold weather clothes that go back to at least 1981. That means I have had them for 30 years! I never would have even guessed that 30 years later I would still be wearing them.

Actually the cold doesn't bother me a bit during my walk. My hands get cold while I bike and I never have found a pair of gloves that are warm enough, but thin enough so I can shift gears and maintain control of the bike.

I just switched from biking by "distance" rather than "time". I found I was dogging it to use up time, if I go by the distance, I am more likely to go faster so I can reach my mileage faster!

However, the Winter continues and I wish again I had made arrangements to be somewhere hot and warm sometime this Winter as I wait for Spring to arrive.

One thought keeps me going through the cold winter-Spring is coming and the first little yellow flowers will soon show up!

Best Buy (Mission Accomplished?)

Just to finish the situation with Best Buy.

Our TV was finally taken to the shop and apparently finally fixed. At least it hasn't had a problem yet.

The Tivo has been installed correctly and we are taking our Comcast box back tomorrow.

We haven't paid the $109 for the "service call" that was actually a warranty call, but since we now have proof that it was installed incorrectly (even according to Best Buy) when the Best Buy "Geek Squad" Agent came out and tried to say nothing was wrong and charge us $109. We haven't gotten a letter saying we didn't owe it, but we haven't gotten a bill and I'm sure we won't get one.

My major concern about Best Buy is the absolute total refusal of anyone to respond to my concerns and their refusal to apparently even consider that one of their agents were wrong. Our overall total visits include four for the Tivo, and six for the TV since December 5, 2010.

A major concern is that most of the technicians indicated no sense of accountability for doing the job right and the overall glaring lack of concern and response by Best Buy management. The only person who responded at all was the person on Facebook. Absolutely no one else (in immediate or upper management, including the Presidents office) responded or expressed any concern. I wonder how Best Buy stays in business.

A disturbing experience of defective customer service by a major retailer, although I do want to state that the problem was eventually taken care of. If it hadn't been for the attempt to charge us for a warranty call, I would probably be sitting here with an improperly connected Tivo and a defective TV, so it wasn't all bad.

I do have to praise the Best Buy "front line" representatives who listened and kept dispatching technicians to resolve the problem. They did a super job of listening and trying to respond to my concerns. It is too bad the supervisors and upper management demonstrated such a culture of horrible customer service and response, when many of the front line personnel were excellent.

Birds life "brutish and short"

I recently read that a birds life is "brutish and short" and that only 50 % of birds survive during a season. (This was in a short about the bird's "falling dead out of the sky" in Arkansas.

Makes me feel better about the time and efforts I make in feeding the birds in my backyard!

It was the Best of Days and the Worst of Days

December 21 (first day of Winter) is the worst of days because it is the shortest and darkest day of the year and the best of days because the days start getting longer and Summer is coming!

On the other hand, June 21 (first day of Summer) is the best of days because it is the longest and lightest day of the year and the worst of days because the days start getting shorter and Winter is coming!

Problem Resolved? (Somewhat at least)

After 1 1/2 years of frustration, the problem with the Bestbuy tv etc. may be resolved, or at least mitigated. Of course, there is still the matter of the TiVo which was improperly installed with the Comcast Box etc.

A TV repair company that contracts with Bestbuy came by and knew immediately what was wrong. The tv's required a software upgrade Bustbuy was supposed to do before we purchased them.. He did it (from his vehicle) and we haven't had a problem thus far. This, after a year and 1/2 of fighting Comcast and Bestbuy!

Of course, in the ultimate stupidity by Bestbuy, they wouldn't let him do the other tv (the very same model bought on the very same day), because it wasn't authorized and they had some kind of weird policy about one repair per day! Aliene even talked to a Supervisor. I called back and of course couldn’t talk with a Supervisor, but was advised they could simply schedule a work repair.

I didn’t have the numbers and when Aliene called back they advised her they would prefer to “walk me through it”. Of course, so they could blame me if anything went wrong. I advised them they should send the same repair company out.

What is really weird is that the very first repair person they asked to do the work on the tv decided it was an electronic card. (This was without looking at it.) However, they advised they wouldn't do the work unless we took the tv down, undid everything and then reinstall everything. I told them that was unacceptable and so they sent out two other tv repair people, one who didn't find anything wrong and the one who immediately knew what was wrong.

However, Bestbuy had apparently approved the first tv repair shop to change out the electronic card and they advised Aliene, even if not needed, they were going to do it and if we didn't let them in, they would cancel out contract!

We have decided Bestbuy has to be the most disorganized and incompetent company in the world.

To make matters worse, I haven’t received a call from the Bestbuy main office where they advised they WOULD call back within 24-48 hours (that was about 65 hours ago) and a representative who I have been dealing with on the incorrect service call commented that “Well, it wasn’t the Tivo installation”.

Maybe that is why I sold all of my Bestbuy stock.